Thursday, December 06, 2007

Sarah Schmitz

This afternoon, as I was attempting to procrastinate writing an English paper, I signed on to msn and began chatting with my cousin Kaitlin. I began by going on and on about this house I had happened to see on remax (thats how badly I was procrastinating) and she mentioned to me she was avoiding work as well, by reading over my and my sister in laws' blogs.

With the mention of Sarah's blog, I realized I hadn't checked it today, so off I went. Today's post was a mesmerizing account of her struggles and triumphs of motherhood so far.

Now, in the past, Sarah has recounted difficulties she's had and times she's questioned her efforts and methods. I usually respond to these posts with comments of what a wonderful job she really is doing, and how I admire her for it.

But after today's blog, a comment just didn't seem enough. Kaitlin and I continued to discuss the post, and how both of us as young women could only hope to reach such balance and maturity when our turn as mothers and wives come. This made me realize that though Sarah uses her blog as a release and as a way to inform, what she really is doing is uplifting and encouraging those of us that are a few years younger, and have yet to reach this stage in our lives, but think about them daily.

I just wanted to share with her how much she impacts my world, how blessed I feel to have such an outstanding role model to look up to, not because she does everything right, but because she is able to persevere in her trials and constantly looks to God to help her overcome those moments of weakness and difficulty. I want to tell Sarah that at least two women find comfort and wisdom in her words, love in her ability to be so humble yet so strong, and I know I hope to do the same when my own time to be a mom comes. She is able to make motherhood as a young christian woman real, hard, aggrivating, and the most fullfilling, important and loving thing in the world.

Keep on sharing, loving and hoping, Sarah, and we will keep on reading. God gave me a wonderful gift, when he made you my sister.

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

ME

I Am

A woman, a sister, a daughter, a friend, a historian, a reader, a writer, an artist,

I Want

Happy endings and a puppy

I Have

A family that loves me, friends that care, a roof over my head and food in my fridge.

I Wish

Upon stars, when I blow out candles and when clocks turn 11:11

I Hate

Selfishness, cruelness, lack of compassion

I Fear

war, oppression and bugs

I Hear

Laughter, nature, music, and sometimes voices

I Search

for a purpose, for answers, for love, for adventure

I Wonder

Is their life in space? How do they get the Caramel in a Caramilk bar? Why do my eyes change colour?

I Regret

Hurtful words or actions, lost opportunities, crashing into that pole in Ikea

I Love

Chocolate, desserts, animals, babies, books, movies, life, chocolate milk

I Ache

In my knees!

I Always

show up 5 minutes late, sleep as long as possible, act as odd as possible

I Usually

cry, joke around, pull funny faces for pictures, tell people what to do

I Am Not

a boy, purple, a Leafs fan,

I Dance

Rarely, but get whiplash when I headbang

I Sing

Any time I can, usually disney music

I Never

make fun of people to hurt their feelings

I Rarely

lie

I Cry

Very easily, especially at commercials with sappy stories

I Am Not Always

in a good mood

I Lose

my sanity easily

I'm Confused

often

I Need

reassurance, compliments, encouragement

I Should

Do my homework more often

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Apologize

When someone does something to hurt you, delibrately intending you harm and sadness, you should forgive them. This I have been taught since I was very young. However, does forgiving them mean you need to let them back into your life? I recently had someone close to me do something I thought was extremely disrespectful of me, and our relationship. Without going into details, he violated my trust. Now, a little time has past since this incident, and forgiveness has been asked of me, as well as a return to friendship. I have a hard time allowing myself to even think about trusting this person again. Is this wrong of me? In some relationships, people are able to forgive quite a lot of things, and they attempt a return to trust. I do not see myself as one of these people. If someone were to do something such as cheat on me, there would be no other option other than leaving that person, in my mind. I would probably have to struggle a long time to even forgive that person.
Knowing this about myself, I sit and wonder if this trust violator should ever be my friend again.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Greater Good

When I think about my future occupation, I always in some way imagine it will be trying to help others, whether it be working as a school teacher, or for an NGO, or the Foreign Service. Wherever God decides I would serve him best, I remind myself, is what I will do.

I was discussing what my ultimate working dream would be with my aunt the other night, and I revealed to her something that I have been thinking about for a long time, but that I had never really shared with anyone. I shared with her an idea I had for a school specifically aimed towards educating teen moms. Most of the time, when faced with pregnancy and the ultimate responsibility of raising and caring for a child when you're a child yourself, teen girls are forced to leave school to work as single moms, or depend on welfare for the entire period of raising their child. Unfortunately, it continues a cycle of poverty and a dependancy on our system. Very few of these girls are fortunate enough to have the support of family, or someone to look after their child so they can finish school. Many face the scrutiny of Child Welfare, and are in danger of losing their children because they haven't the slightest idea what they are doing. What I hope to achieve with my strange idea is a home and place of education for pregnant teens and new moms, where they could receive the best parenting support and teaching, learn to bond with their new bundle of responsibility, and get to continue high school all under one roof. I know its a strange sort of idea for a 21 year old university student with a minimalist dating record, to want to save the misunderstood, misdirected teenage girls of society, but for some reason I am really drawn to this idea. Nothing like this exists in Canada today, a residential program aimed at ensuring the most sucessful outcome for mother and child. Because one makes a bad decision does not mean you should be labelled and made to pay for that decision the rest of your life by joining the stereotypes of the welfare single mom. I just have to look at my aunt to see that with the right support and encouragement, you can take on the world, no matter your situation. She started out pregnant at 15, a mom by 16, and could very well have spent her life living from support check to food bank assistance, struggling with poverty and various behavioural issues that arise in children in these circumstances. However, with help, she managed to finish school, get through college and, though not without some struggle, become the CIO of Red Cross Canada, the mother of a successful 34 year old Jennifer, who herself is the mother to 5 wonderful kids.
With former foster parents for a Mom and Dad, I have seen my share of kids and babies taken from their homes, homes that lacked parenting skills, usually any drive to better themselves and were run in abuse. I have seen the worst that can happen, and want to formulate a way to keep it from happening, if even for only a few families. I have no real idea how I can bring this idea about, as I have yet to complete my own degree, and its certainly not in How to Open your Own School for Disadvantaged Young Mothers 101. This would require much funding, research, more funding, teachers, parenting coaches, many different things that I have no access to, but maybe one day I will. Maybe Oprah will decide that this school is the next one she'll open, here in Canada! Hehehe. At any rate, it's something I find myself contemplating while I watch graduation loom ever near.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Its Paper time!

The next month is going to be one crazy ride! With 6 papers due within a 3 week span, my mind is all ready reeling with the thought of enduring all this writing!
I complain and say its just not fair, its too much work! I am usually reminded, however, that this is not unfair, unjust, or some all powerful university god-like Dean trying to make my life miserable, but something of my own design. It really is my all my fault, for a) taking on a double major and b) choosing two majors that require vast amounts of reading and tedious paper-writing. When you put it that way...eep.
Yesterday I had a meeting with my academic adviser to plan my graduation. AHH. A year from next month, I will be graduating from university! I have conflicting thoughts about this, ranging from yes it's almost over, to what will I do next? I'm also umming and ahhing over what my chosen career will be once I'm all done. The plan is teachers college following graduation, but what if for some freak reason I don't get accepted anywhere? what then? what can one do with a history and english degree? Not that much, unsurprisingly. Its going to be an interesting year, attempting to find what roleI'll get to play in life. All I can really do is leave that all up to God. I'm sure he'll give me hint eventually. I hope.

In the meantime, I will continue to be distracted by the great book I just bought at chapters, you know, instead of preparing for the essays I have to write!

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Ding Dong the Witch is Dead!

Or at least, is moving out!
Yes, the end of the roommate saga is now in sight!
For those of you raising an eyebrow in confusion, I'll summarize the last two months of living with the wicked witch of the east(she's from montreal)

This year, I am working as a Residence Advisor for the University of Ottawa, and living in the apartment style residence called Hyman-Soloway(yes an unfortunate name, I know) It is the most expensive housing on campus. I am living in a two bedroom apartment, and seeing as none of my friends have enough money to pay to live there, I had to be assigned a roommate. My roommate contacted me over the summer using facebook to introduce herself. I was a little bit nervous about her, as most of her pictures were of her partying at various clubs, making the "i'm a sexy model" pouty face. I'll admit I was definitely judging the book by its supposed cover.
I had the opportunity to talk to her own the phone, and she reassured me she was very serious about her studies, and doing quebec civil law.

Well, move in came and went, and things seemed to be going well. We had to fill out a unit agreement, where we decided on cleaning chores and visitors, that kind of thing, manditory by order of my Coordinator, my boss. The problems began when my roommate decided she didn't have the time to do dishes after every meal. Or every day for that matter. It wouldn't have been a huge problem except, she was using all my dishes, pots and pans, and appliances. I ended up having to wash pots to be able to cook supper for myself. I approached Sara about this, and she returned with, I don't want people in the apartment aftet 11, its quiet hours, so there shouldn't be anyone here. This annoyed me, but I agreed to it, even though I am allowed to have anyone I want at any time as long as we're not excessively loud. But i was trying to compromise. Sara, however, didn't keep up her end of the bargain. She also never took her weekly turn to clean the apartment. So I tried talking with her again. She basically told me she didn't have time to clean all the time, that I was being anal or OCD or just too bossy, and that she did not feel obligated to do anything to assist in keeping our living space clean. She became very hostile, and i realized nothing i had to say would get through to her. So i said our only other choice was to do a mediation with my boss, because I would not live in that kind of hostility. She was extremely rude, and of course I had a good cry with the Rez Life manager. I arranged with my boss to hold a mediation between us. She sent my roommate a letter informing her of the meeting. She received it at 2 in the morning and was furious. She banged on my door, demanding to know why I went to housing, calling my a tattle tale and a baby. I informed her I would not have a discussion with her yelling at 2 in the morning, and shut my door. She proceeded to throw the worlds biggest tantrum, screaming at yelling at me, calling me every name in the book, and slamming every door in the apartment. Safe in my locked room, I decided just to let her scream it out, and file a harassment report with Campus Protection in the morning. I also wrote down word for word all she screamed at me and sent it in an e-mail to my boss, and also gave that to protection.
So the meeting commenced less than a week later. My roommate apologized, then basically refused to compromise in any way about cleaning or anything, agreed to a room change and said she would bring her own dishes and pots. We went two weeks waiting for a room to come up for her to move into, because I agreed to wait for something that met her needs as much as possible. In the meantime, she was civil, i was civil. She didn't clean, but used mostly her own dishes. I indured her talking behind my back blatantly with her friends, usually when she was aware that I could hear her.
Finally, they find her a room, and call us in for a meeting. She declared she didn't want to move anymore, that I should be the one to move since i'm the one with the problem..she's happy. Of course, that's not possible, because i'm the RA i don't move. So she decided to bring her dad into the fray, and kept making and cancelling appointments with housing for close to two weeks. Meanwhile, she's being even more of a slob, has friends over 'hanging out' till past 3am, and is generally making my life hell. Just when I thought I would be stuck with her forever, she and her father finally make it to a meeting with housing, who informed them she was moving into this other unit, like it or not, by Friday. So, after all this time, I am finally rid of her!

The end is near, and while a house didn't fall on her and kill her, she's no longer going to be messing up my life! HAPPY DANCE!! There's no place like my roommate free home!

And as one of my managers asked her at the last meeting, infront of her father: Is 30 minutes of housework really that much to ask of you?

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Prayer request

I have a prayer request for you all: My aunt has just found out she has a cancerous tumour in her bladder. This is probably the best place to have cancer though, because it is easy to treat, and cannot spread easily. She is very optomistic, as is the doctor, but we would still appreciate it if everyone holds her up in prayer right now.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

I'm BACK!!

Wow,
It has been quite some time since I've been on here, let alone blogged! I have been having difficulty accessing the blogging system, and my account. Today, I decided to investigate, and saw that I had to transfer it into a google account! So, here I am!

Life has been extremely busy, working as an RA for the residences here in Ottawa, as well as my reception job. Then add school to that mix, and the result is a crazy crazy Kelsey! Nothing that new or exciting has been happening in my life, besides a haircut! I promise a weekly update of the blog from now on though, as it also serves as a de-stresser to write things out like this!

Until something more exciting happens,
I'm just happy to be back!

Friday, April 27, 2007

Ohio trips

Hi everyone!

I know I know, its been a really really long time since I've posted anything, but this last semester has been quite the busy one, with lots of papers, classes, and working a lot! I did find time for two trips to Ohio, however, I would very much like to share the pictures I have. I am posting a link to my already online albums of the trip, but everyone can access them, so just click and view Kurt and I in Ohio for spring break, and the Schmitz family, minus Tim, in Ohio for Easter.

http://uottawa.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2063212&l=9c81c&id=121507105

I also have one last exam tomorrow morning, the 28th, and then I will be moving out of residence as well. I will be back in Cornwall for the summer, so I will have more of a chance to blog! Also some good news on the job front, I will be working as a Historical Interpreter at Upper Canada Village, which is a recreation of a village in the 1860s, with mills, farms, an Inn and a school house. If you've never been, its a great chance to learn more about Canadian history and there are lots of fun things to do. I will be dressed up in period clothing, being one of the villagers, working at domestic tasks and interacting with visitors! I'm pretty excited for it, though its going to be one hot summer!

Thursday, January 25, 2007

Birthday Plans

Well I thought I would just briefly outline the big 2-1 for everyone:

Thursday evening, my friends sierra and erin are coming over to get pretty and watch grey's anatomy before we head out with a big group of my friends for a night at my favourite Irish Pub, Heart and Crown. There, we get to sit back and relax and listen to some fantastic bands, and celebrate my coming of age at midnight. Should be a good time!

As for the day itself, I will be going to class, spending the day with my best buds cameron and danvy, and then heading off to dinner with my mom at Red Lobster, and then going home with her for the weekend to relax before papers and midterms start at the beginning of february...all in all, it should be grand...I hope so!

Friday, January 19, 2007

Update

Hello all
Just a quick update from the land of Kelsey. T-minus 6 days till I turn 21. Weird. No plans as of yet, except for dinner out with my mom. It will probably be a pretty low key event.

School is insane, keeping me pretty busy. I've actually managed to make friends in my classes this semester. I'm not one for doing that usually. One actually looked me up on Facebook, this group messaging sight where you can post messages and pictures on each others pages to keep in touch...its the new MSN messenger.

Last night I witnessed my older brother Tim play and sing 3 songs at an open mic night, backed up by russ. I must say, I was extremely blown away by his talent. If I might speak for the other sibling present, Kurt, he was also impressed. We of course, brought everyone we're close friends with to this event, and they cheered obnoxiously, yet were also impressed with Tim's singing. Shocker of the Decade: Tim is GREAT...not just good, we knew that, but he's actually GREAT.

Also, I'm preparing for my trip down to Ohio for Spring Break! And by preparing I mean telling people I'm doing it. I'm sure Ryan will have it all mapped out with the best places for me to stop before I even bother getting around to planning it out.

I am currently reading Alice's Adventures in Wonderland for my Fantasy and Myth class. I am also reading the mock epic Rape of the Lock by Alexander Pope, one of my all time favourites.

Whats new in everyone elses world? Let me know whats new with you!

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Post Christmas/First week of school

Hello all,
It has just come to my attention that it has been over a month since I've had time/bothered to blog anything!!!

So, per Jenny's request, I will begin with Christmas. It was busy, it was loud, and it was crazy, in true Schmitz family fashion. Many movies were watched, dozens of my mom's desserts were consumed, and boardgames and card playing occurred nightly. My mom made these fantastic squares called mars bar squares, derived from a recipe my grandmother was given in a grocery store. My mom added her own little twist to it, melting Cadbury chocolate on top. I ate many.

Micah and Eva were the stars of the Schmitz Show, from their colouring for grandma, to hide and go seek with anyone who would play. We watched Dora; I annoyed Sarah by questioning the accuracy of the content from the show; she shrugged a lot. Eva snotted on anyone she could get her hands on, especially the kitties. Micah amazed Ryan, Sarah and I in Mcdonalds by balancing on a high ledge. Where she got the idea to perform such an act, only Brandon knows. We enjoyed the girls very much! I spent a majority of my time poking Sarah in the belly for the off chance that the baby would decide it should be awake and moving when its auntie was around. No such luck. Tim consumed more turkey this christmas holiday than all of us combined. We just stood back and snickered as mom attempted to fatten he and kurtis up. We even fit in a day for the girls to go to Ottawa for some Dim Sum. All in all, it was a wonderful time, though too short and hectic by far.

As for the new school year: It began a bit rough, as I, for the first time in my academic career, immediately detested two of my five classes. The first was British North America 1763-1867. I was fairly interested in taking this class, but, at the end of the first intro lecture, I was NOT impressed. No, no problem with the subject matter, but with the 25 year old brand new Prof teaching it who was overcompensating for his newness by submerging the class in overwhelming amounts of essays, 200 dollar textbooks, and all round terrible english skills (very very quebecois) I quickly made my way to the faculty to switch out of this course. Instead, I chose History of Western Europe from 5th-15th century. I must say, I love it so far. Its fascinating, the prof is fantastic, and we have an awesome assignment called an immersion experience, where each student is assigned a job and a general profile, and from there, we create the life and experience, based on research, of our character. I was assigned BAKER. I have yet to find out if I'm a guy or a girl, and from there, I will get to choose an appropriate 13th century Belgian name, because we are all based in the medieval city of Burge Belgium. We have the paper to write, as well as an invited life story and profile, and a journal. I'm pretty impressed with the experience he's attempting to give us. Even his lectures are interesting, filled with art and first person journal cases from various areas. This class will be a lot of work, but I am very pumped for it.

The next horror story occurred in my much anticipated Fantasy and Myth class. I, unfortunately, got stuck with a bozo that decided the GENRE Fantasy was silly, and Tolkien and Lewis and Rowling were boring, therefore he wanted to concentrate on Mythical works, and use the title Fantasy to cover humankinds fantasies/desires. First class, we watched a film about Persius, son of Zeus, which was basically a porno about greek mythology.
I made my way to the English department at 8am the next day to insist I be placed in the other section, which, thankfully, had one last opening. I attended the new class today, and thank GOD it was traditional Fantasy and Myth. We study all the good ones, from Alice in wonderland, Harry Potter, and a Wrinkle in Time. I'm so relieved all the stupidity is behind me.

So now I'm looking at the following classes for this semester:

History of Western Europe from 5th to 15th century
History of Great Philosophers
History of the USSR
English Literature from 1700
Fantasy, Myth and Language

Should be a full term, with lots of hard work, sprinkled with fun times with my floor mates (I heart Cam and Danvy!) and more movie watching, of course.

I promise I will also blog more!! Maybe, if anyone finds it interesting, I will keep you updated on my Belgian Baker.